So there is really no elegant way to post music from youtube via mobile to here yet? Me? I'm doing well. There are these things--Memories of Happiness--that found their way to me (although I do not think I had encountered anyone name the phenomenon that way). I'm alone in them, and that is... groovy (?). Like that heart-squeezing (no, indeed that must have been lungs contracting) elation when I jumped into the lake on a cold September morning. And still.
I have accepted, internalised it. During one worst moment, the worst of me came and really damaged Hope. It was the only model of behaviour that I knew, in those circumstances. I'll cary the consequence with me until the end.
So yes. Just let me remember the HAPPY of the cold calm water hugging me. Let me forget some other HAPPIES. To forgive is to justify everything. And luckily I am through that, too. I'm through with everything now. And Still. Do you hear me when I say I am so, so sorry. Again and again and again.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xc-oGWPlFVA&feature=youtube_gdata_player
